DEBBIE--THIS IS ALL I CAN SAY RIGHT NOW

THIS PAST TUESDAY I SPENT THE AFTERNOON VISITING WITH DEBBIE AT HER HOUSE.

I tried to visit her every three weeks. On this Tuesday's visit, she wanted to talk about death. It wasn't the first time, and it's never unusual for someone who is 84 1/2 to want to talk about it. We talked a long time. It was very much on her mind. It was a private conversation and will stay that way, but it felt good to both of us.

As I got up to leave she said, "It's almost New Year's. I'll see you right after. I love you."

"And you know how much I love you," I replied.

We smiled at each other and I turned and started to walk away. After about four steps I was seized with the feeling that I would never see her again. It was fleeting, but I made sure I turned around and made eye contact with her before I left. Thank God I did, and thank you God for giving me the gift of being with her the day before Carrie was supposed to come home.